Diva Corner

It is funny to me that no matter how old we get, or how long we’ve been out of “the game” that we still act like awkward, giggly, anxious pre-teens when we get the opportunity to meet a “prospective” new love.

I am almost 37 years old. I have been divorced for 4 years and have had no real luck with the “dating scene.” Trust me… NO LUCK. ☺

I have a great job, a nice home, drive a pretty nice vehicle, pay my own bills, take care of my own yard, and am raising my little boy all by myself. I have wonderful friends, and a great church. I have a full, busy life. Yet, I still have that age-old feeling of some sort of emptiness without a man in my life.

Now, don’t get me wrong. I’ve tried dating over the past few years. I’ve made a couple of friends out of the experience. But that is it. No bells or whistles or fireworks. Nothing really to do cartwheels over. I basically resolved myself to just be alone & be ok with it. I don’t go to singles spots, or bars. I work, go to church, take my son to school, and stay home. Life is pretty simple and routine.

Then, a friend wants to introduce me to a “good guy”. With many apprehensions and qualms, I do it. I go to meet him. And you know what? He is not a toad. He is not a demon-possessed evil being sent to destroy me (which has kinda been how I’ve viewed men most recently.) ☺ He’s quite handsome, and seems to have his ducks in a row. I mean we ALL have some wrinkled up issues that need to be ironed out. I’m sure he is no exception.

But, here’s what is funny about it all: I’m smiling. Uncontrollably, smiling. I’m anxious to paint my nails, shave my legs, try on 15 outfits, and find just the right lip-gloss, just to have lunch with him. He’s called me a few times, and I find myself almost “giggling” when the phone rings. Isn’t that hilarious?

Now, I don’t know if ANYTHING will develop out of this or not. And I’m ok if it does or if it doesn’t. I’ve just realized, we ALL want to feel loved, desired, attractive, and accepted. No matter our age. No matter our situation. No matter our expanding waistbands or newly found gray hairs. We as women, or maybe just as human beings, have an internal, natural, instinctive “need” to be with a mate. It has somehow made me feel like “more of a woman.” It has somehow made me feel more alive. Just to have someone that I am equally attracted to, say, “I think you are pretty.” It feels really nice. We’ll soon see if this could be the beginning of a new journey or not. But even if it was just one step, and that’s as far as it goes. It’s been a nice trip. ☺

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In addition to being the Advertising Consultant for The Times Dispatch, I am also an Independent Beauty Consultant for AVON. I LOVE make-up! I think I actually love make-up more than SHOES, if you can imagine that!

I am also a huge fan of “What Not to Wear” on television. Carmandy is the make-up guru on the show. I’ve discovered that I use a lot of her same tricks & tips on putting on make-up. Now, I’m not saying I’m an expert. But, I have worn makeup, daily for 25 years. ☺

So, I thought I’d pass along a few tricks of the trade:

1. Please make sure your foundation &/or powder is the right shade for you! Don’t apply to the inside of your wrist, to match the color. Instead, apply a dab to your neck (just below your jaw line). If you don’t see streaks, then you’ve got a winner!

2. When applying eyeshadow, use a vanilla or very light shade of pink or gold to apply right under your brow & also on the inside corner of your eyes. This brightens & opens up the eyes.

3. Apply mascara to your bottom lashes first. Then you won’t get mascara mess on your eyelid.

4. If you have very dry skin or wrinkly skin, do not use a lot of face powder. Just a light dusting of translucent powder to set your foundation. Also, for this face type, try to use a cream blush. It doesn’t settle in the “cracks” as badly.

5. Only put emphasis on one feature at a time. If you are doing a dark or smokey eye, then use a pale lip color. If you want to do a deep or bold color on the lips, then go light on the eyes. If you try to do both at once, it can look clownish.

6. When doing a smokey eye, you don’t have to use only browns & blacks. Depending on your eye color, try a dark navy or steel gray. Also, dark plum & copper shades work great!

7. Waterproof mascara is harsher on the lashes. It’s harder to remove, and can cause your lashes to break & dry out.

8. Red lips are still IN! Just make sure you find the right shade of red for your skin tone.

9. Please remove your makeup before bed! It really does make a difference in the way your skin looks.

10. Use moisturizer, with a sunscreen, year around.

11. Keep your eyebrows groomed. You don’t have to go to the salon. It’s really easy to take care of this at home. There are tweezers, waxes, eyebrow tape, etc. The shape should be as follows: The inside corner of the brow should line up, diagonally from the inside corner of the eye. The arch should line up by going diagonally, from the pupil of the eye (up and out.) Finally, the outside corner should line up, diagonally from the out side corner of the eye (up & out.)

Just remember...
Beauty comes from within! But, a little lip gloss never hurts!

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Do you ever wonder why they say the “average” size for a woman in America is a size 10/12? Really??? I know a lot more women, myself included, who happily fit into the size 14 to 18 category. It’s quite funny to me that a “size” is actually used to describe a person anyway. Especially since every clothes designer uses a different scale. A size 12 in one brand would be more like a size 8 in another. While you can lay on the dressing room floor & squeeze your gut in to try and wiggle into a size 18 in another brand. Then, comes the joy of trying to get up from that dressing room floor! There’s some exercise! I mean, let’s face it, most dressing rooms are smaller than a closet. On a rare occasion you can find a large dressing room, complete with a bench or a chair. Ahhh… those are nice!
Since, I too am more of a curvaceous/voluptuous woman (let’s not use the words fat or fluffy), I feel your pain. Quite literally, at times. Don’t you just love “elastic?” Seriously, I do love clothes, accessories,and especially shoes!! Yes, I am here to admit it, I am a shoe addict! It’s very hard to find cute, trendy, fashionable items in “women’s sizes.” If you can find it in a size that you can actually breathe in, then it is usually very “matronly” or makes you look much older than you are, or actually makes you look “bigger” than you are, just because of the way it is made. Hmmm…. Now for every one of you lucky ones who truly are a size 6 or under, you might be saying “Why don’t you fat girls just lose some weight & then you can wear the same cute clothes that we can?”
Well, my answer to that would be, “Why don’t you skinny girls just enjoy a box of Twinkies every once in a while & then try to zip your jeans?” ☺ I do not hate nor wish any ill towards skinnier women, I really don’t. I am just looking at it from a plus-size prospective, and adding a little humor to it. ☺

Let’s all just be healthy! My wise words for those who are standing in front of the mirror & cursing your thighs, would be this:
Try to get some form of exercise every day. Try to drink lots and lots of water. Try to avoid eating “fast food” 3 meals a day. Smile, enjoy life, enjoy your friends, enjoy your children, enjoy every day. Finally, put on your size 18 jeans with some fabulous high heels, shiny lip gloss, and just be YOU!

In closing, here are a few funny thoughts…

“The hole is the least fattening part of a donut. Unfortunately, you have to eat the rest to get to it.”

“Potato chips are crunchy, like lettuce. So, they ARE diet food.”

“I’m in shape. Round is a shape.”

“DIET” is a 4-letter word.

A fat-free “diet shake” is really good (when you dunk Oreos in it & chase it down with some “cheese-doodles.” ☺

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